“Ladies,” Buckington said, “I'd like you to meet Dick Hare from What The Fuck magazine, come to do a story on me. Dick, my ex wife, Nison Wett, and our daughter, Sliparee Ann.”

“So nice to make your acquaintance, Mr. Hare,” Nison said, smiling, extending her gloved hand for a kiss.

“Please, call me Dick,” I said, accepting my new name without further argument. “And not that it matters much, but it's None Of Your Business magazine.”

Go Back to The Village of Butt: Act I Excerpts